If Abortion Wasn’t A Big Deal, You Wouldn’t Get Emotional About It.
I am pro-choice but anti-abortion.
Abortion is a choice. It is not a right. Just like killing any innocent human being is a choice, not not a right. Women will continue to get abortions whether they are legal or not; this is purely a moral subject for me. I do not to judge you just like I have not judged any of my friends or family who have had first trimester abortions; I only have empathy for you and the difficult decision you had to make. I only pass judgment on those who call it a right, and take pride in the death.
If your choice is to abort, it should be a hard one and it needs to be followed up by a healing process. It's your business and no law will stop you if it's what you want. But don't try and convince the world that it's no big deal. It is. You wouldn't be defending it if it wasn't. You wouldn't get emotional if it wasn't.
Several women close to me have had the procedure. They all had their own reasons, and none of them took their decision lightly. I may not understand half those reasons, but it's their circumstance, not mine, and I don't pretend to know better. I still love them and consider them to be good people, even though they did something I consider to be morally wrong. I also understand that in the first trimester, even for the most in-tune woman, it's difficult to empathize with something so tiny. It's difficult to think of such a small living entity as a human being. It's much easier to empathize with yourself the humans outside your body; I do not throw these truths away in the name of dogmatic virtue.
We don't all think the same. This does not change foundations of morality, but it's important to acknowledge.
Read the following sentences and note your reactions.
– A financially stable 30 year old woman gets pregnant by her husband and gets an abortion without telling him
– A doctorate student's birth control fails. After consulting her boyfriend she decides to take time off school, have the baby and give it up for adoption
– A 15 year old girl, dependent of her family, gets raped and keeps the baby
– A 25 year old woman gets pregnant after a tinder "date," and educes an abortion with drugs purchased from China in her 3rd trimester
All these cases can be classified as extreme, and depending on who is reading, the extent of how extreme they seem will vary. All this shows is that life isn't black and white, and neither is abortion.
"Don't tell me what to do with my body!"
This is a sidebar, but a worthy one. "Don't tell me what to do with my body!" is something pro-choice women love to say. Let's assume the separate entity that is your unborn child somehow qualifies as "your body"…it goes both way ladies. In fact, in my experience, I've know more women bullied into getting abortions, or told to get abortions, than women who were "told" not to.
When it comes to something so close to a woman's heart, body, and essence, we should have supportive conversations instead of politically driven, stubborn, assumptious, mean interactions. If we as adult women can't act human, then we have no right to decide whether a fetus is human.
For further reading, especially if you consider yourself a feminist, see Naomi Wolfe's "Our Bodies, Our Souls." If a feminist had the guts to face the firing squad of her current community, you have no excuse to not think deeper on this issue.
"The Real World"
I have a video called "Why you're wrong about abortion" that speaks about how we love to draw arbitrary lines when it comes to this issue. I still believe that. In terms of ethics, all abortion, under any circumstance (with the exception of endengerment to the mother's life) is wrong. But I am willing to come down from the manageable world of philosophy and engage in our imperfect world with imperfect systems and imperfect people. What changes – within our current system – would I like to see imposed? I will split my legal reasoning into trimesters, as they are currently the simplest and most manageable ways to a create distinction between the severity of the procedure.
1st Trimester – 0-13 weeks
Legal. Done safely by trained doctors. A mandatory consultation where there is a candid & accurate explanation of the procedure relative to the week of fetal development. A minimum 24hr wait time between the consultation and appointment to abort. A mandatory counseling session after the procedure. Encouragement of the father's participation throughout.
2nd Trimester – 14-27 weeks
Illegal, with the exception of a life threatening situation. If woman gets an abortion with the help of an abortionist, the abortionist is charged with first degree murder. The woman and anyone who financially facilitated the abortion will be judged similarly to a person who hires a hitman. Anyone who is shown to have pushed for or supported the action in some way can be charged with accessory. If the abortion is performed solo, the woman is charged with first degree murder.
3rd Trimester – 28-32 weeks
Same as 2nd trimester, with harsher sentencing.